Meeting Elah

I have been meaning to write a blog post on meeting our sweet girl for a while, but..... well things have been a bit crazy :) Elah Bailee arrived on February 9th 2014 after 31 long hours of labor. Yes, that's right, 31 hours of labor. To be honest, I wasn't all that scared of labor and delivery because I am pretty good at managing pain but after 31 hours of intense pain, I was certain of one thing... I couldn't manage anything on my own anymore. I wanted my birthing experience to be two things: to be dependent on the Lord for strength and for Taylor and I to experience a kind of unity that we had never experienced before. The Lord was gracious as always and allowed me to experience both.

Taylor was my champion all 31 hours. He truly amazed and impressed me more during those 31 hours than in the past 10 years and that is saying a lot. The Lord continued to strengthen both of us as labor became more intense.

When the time finally came to meet our sweet daughter there were what seemed like 15 people in our delivery room. Because my labor had gone so long there was an increased risk to Elah and I suppose the nurses had to be prepared for anything. Elah was healthy and we couldn't have been more grateful.

The moment they laid a tiny human on my chest was a moment that Taylor and I will never forget. I will never forget the look my husband's face when he saw his daughter for the first time. The most amazing experience of my life. Hands down. There she was, this sweet baby that the Lord had created inside of my belly. She was amazing. Half of me and half of the man I love, knit together in one beautiful baby girl. There are no words to explain the feeling of meeting your child for the first time. Simply amazing.

The weeks that followed were surprising to me. I am not sure how much of it was exhaustion and how much of it was my plummeting hormones but I have never been so weepy in my life. It seemed like every time someone would look at me I would cry. Again, my husband was a champ during these first weeks. He was steadfast and encouraging and gently reminded me over and over again that I just had a baby and that everything was ok. My mom and Laren stayed with us for a while and were such a help to us. They cooked and cleaned and stayed up with Elah while I caught up on some sleep.

Now, fast forwarding to 17 weeks later which is today. Motherhood is amazing. It is really difficult at times but it is amazing. I would say the hardest thing about motherhood is during all of the craziness and exhaustion is still being a good wife. Loving the Lord well is loving my husband well and loving my husband well is loving my daughter well. So, I am very much still in the baby stages of finding the balance of it all. I am grateful for motherhood already because the Lord is revealing so much of my selfishness to me. It's ugly but better out than in, right? God is good to us and gracious beyond measure. I am confident that we will look back on this season and see His faithfulness in using our daughter to make us more like His son and that is what it is all about.

This is what our bald beauty looked like when she was brand new :)