Becoming Lovely

I’m at a stage in my life right  now where I am surrounded by an oasis of uncertainty. What am I to do with this life that I’ve been given? What is my role in the body of Christ? What does it mean to be a woman of God? As a “20-something” year old I am asked questions such as “What do you want to do with your degree”, “What are you plans after college”. Rather quickly I come up with lofty ideas that make me seem ambitious but what I really want to say is I don’t know, I don’t know! Now, I know that these are merely part of small talk conversation so it would be frowned upon if I did shout I don’t  know, so I stick with the over ambitious goals and “plans”.

Recently I’ve been dwelling upon one thought, one question…when and how does one become a woman? Is it when I am financially independent? Maybe it’s when I get married. Or certainly it’s when I can host and cook a Thanksgiving dinner all on my own. When am I no longer a girl? I feel like I’ve tapped into the mind of Brittney Spears when she wrote that awful song “Not Yet a Woman”. Although it’s comical, this question has been my main focus lately.

I have to be honest, there are times when I am so far from lady-like that it’s a bit scary. That’s why this idea of continuous, all encompassing womanhood overwhelms me. When I think of a woman, I envision her to be beautiful, “put-together”, wise, motherly and domestic… all together lovely. I think of her as a talented seamstress, the best stain remover and not to mention the best cook since Betty White…. I mean Betty Crocker. If you know me then you know this “ideal” woman that I’ve just described couldn’t be further from who I am. I am no seamstress and I am certainly no Betty Crocker. I cook cereal and sandwiches and my biggest sewing achievement is an iron on patch.

If I had to label this season of my life I would name it “becoming lovely”. I’m embarking on a terrifying journey. I’m delving into the depths of womanhood in hopes of becoming a wise and lovely woman of God. This is going to be challenging and absolutely hilarious. I’ll try to write about new things that I learn and do for any of you who share these overwhelmed and confused feelings about becoming a woman. Until my first attempt at becoming lovely… see ya!